without you..

I'm sad,
so sad..
I don't know..
I just can't stop the tears.
It keeps on flowing, and flowing, and flowing..
My hearts breaking..
I can't stop it.
Confused. Broken.
All I know, is I am hurting right now..
so much hurt, so much pain
that is too hard to endure..
I let go of the man I love..
the man, that I would want to spend the rest of my life..
Pushed him away..
so far away that I couldn't catch up to him when I decided to bring him back.
He is so far from my reach.

I love him..
that's what my heart tells me.
But he doesn't want me anymore.
I have hurt him so much that it'll be impossible for me to take him back.
Caused him too much pain.

I was wrong.
I know...
that is why I'm paying for it.
That is why I'm crying,
That is why I'm in pain.

I want to see him for the last time..
I want to hold his hands once again,
I want to hug him so tight..
and never want to let go..
I wanted to kiss him to tell him I would never ever pushed him away again.
But I was also afraid that if I tell him all these things, if I do all these things,
I'll push him even farther.


Broken, wouldn't be enough..
Torn wouldn't be either.
Incomplete that's me without him.